Broken Inside
by Death by Damnation
Summary: With a broken cry, a sonorous shatter of glass ripped through the bathroom, into the hallways, probably alerting the teachers, students, and prefects who were searching me as to where I was. Suicide/Character Death beware!
1. Chapter 1

Too much.

Thin scars shed melancholic spheres of the crimson relief on the pale ivory skin of my wrist. They welled up into puddles on the grooves carved violently into my skin with self induced agony. Sinister silhouettes danced around my demented vision, egging me on, bringing the thoughts of blissful death back to the turmoil ridden surface of my mind. I watched in horrid fascination as the scarlet blood pooled in the tense palms of my hand, beading to thin morbid streams of the hot scalding liquid that bled out of my wrist at a pain startlingly rapid pace. The trance inducing liquid pooled into the basin, staining the snow white porcelain contours of the Hogwarts sink, mingling with the beads of water that slid down the cool basin of the boy's bathroom sink turning into rosebud veins of solace.

As the quill sharpening tool fell abused to the floor with a sickening clatter, I lifted my gaze to the mirror to glare at the monster in the mirror with contempt for the umpteenth time this hour. An intense hatred festered in a vile, almost nefarious, fashion in those wicked avada kedavra pigmented orbs.

A horribly taunting voice came out of the lips on the thing echoed clearly as it sneered at us in a drawling voice, "Look at us, were pathetic, how the hell do they expect us to save their bloody ungrateful arses? We can't even take a little pressure from school time bullies and self-absorbed gits of a teacher who can't let go of a grudge from over two decades ago."

Blood spattered our face in thick streams of blood mixing with angry tears, a sneer taut upon our lips, bringing attention away from that horrendous scar of a lightning bolt carved into my forehead, a reminder that my parents were brutally murdered in the cold blood right in front of my innocent eyes.

I grit my teeth in contempt as the words from earlier that had pushed me off the edge came back to life in the desolate wasteland of a broken heart.

"Well look what we have here Potter, Can you ever do anything right? You're just like your man whore of a father." The sadistic glee in the man's soulless obsidian black tunnel like eyes brought unadulterated rage to find root in my heart before wrapping it's thorny vines of hate locked around my heart.

"Well if it isn't Potty and Weasel, look at the pathetic little beggars. One is an attention seeking orphan while one lives in a barn full of eight other weasels. Shame, we do not have enough exterminators because the weasels breed like rabid rabbits." The superior smirk told enough without the utter disdain and smugness in his molting brick gray eyes.

White hot fury grasped my soul with a vice grip, a roaring in my ears resonated, the raw fury of the scream tearing through my throat and shaking the walls with a reverberating angry passion. With a broken cry, a sonorous shatter of glass ripped through the bathroom, into the hallways, probably alerting the teachers, students, and prefects who were searching me as to where I was.

The reflective glass split into hundreds of pieces growing finer as they reached the point of impact. Glass dug into the muscles between my discolored knuckles, showing the reflective surface glinting in the pale skin.

My eyes floated to an especially sharp and jagged glass glinting on the tiled floor, laying innocently in a pool of water. Roughly, my hand darted down to the piece of mirror, the edges slicing into the palms of my hands sending a shot of pain through the palm of my hand and a dull throb through my wrists.

I closed my eyes, a thought racing through my mind "It's better than everything falling down right before me."

Without a second though I plunged the shard into my gut, pulling it out over and over again. The pain sending ripples of feeling through my stomach instead of the usual numb feeling that pulled through my entire soul.

Alarmed shrieks faded into the background as repeated the action that grew in greater force and pace. Blood poured out of my mouth, trailing down the corner of it, dripping onto my shirt and pants.

Tremors racked my body as I realized that I had slid down into a sitting position with bloody gurgle. I thrust the shard into my stomach once again, my arms were pulled back with a prying force, the glass shard plowing deep inside of my stomach in a upward arch pulling through my lower abdominal area before exiting above my solar plexus. To tell you the truth, it felt good, just to end that never ending numbness that swallowed me whole.

The arms that restrained myself forced me so I was laying on my back, the pain pounding in my head, it felt good... My eyes searched fruitlessly for what ever it was that kept me from falling into the dark abyss that I dreamed of, yearned for with an unhealthy obsession. Faces became clear as I coughed up more blood, some of it splattering the people with a thick coat of the fluid.

I focused with difficulty on the faces around me, the distraught faces of people: Prof. Mcgonagall, , Prof. Sprout, Prof. Snape, Prof. Dumbledore, Hermione, Ron, Ginny, Luna, Neville, and Moony. Tch, they are all a bunch of bastards. Pretending they care for me, well with the exception of Moony, Luna, Hermione, and Neville, they never did anything to me, they actually cared. The teachers never helped me, they never believe me when I say there is something wrong... Ginny is just a self absorbed bitch who is after my money along with whoring herself off to every bloke in sight because she thinks I will become_ jealous._ Ron, I understand he was my first friend, but after he left me in fourth year, I can never trust him like I did before, the words he said, how he treated me, and Prof. Dumbledore? Tch, to the bastard I am just a pawn in his little game of war. Moony... I loved him like a father, I am so sorry Moony... Luna... she was so innocent, so sweet... she was like a little sister, and I'm going to miss her.

Moony choked back a heart wrenching sob, "Why, Harry? WHY!"

I smiled in spite of myself, "I couldn't take it..."

Prof. Mcgonagall clearly not hearing the response cried, "Who made you do this?"

I laughed a hollow laugh, "I did this to myself."

A startled gasp passed through the crowd. My hair was plastered to my face with blood as I looked down, scowling before looking up and giving them a monotone response, "I am sorry Moony, Neville, Mione, Luna... I can't do this..."

I took a shuddering breath, "You all with the exception of those four have all lost my trust, more than once sometimes, and I refuse to live in a world where they pressure me into saving their arses starting from when I was eleven and treat me like a messiah one minute and scowl at me like I am Voldemort himself the next."

Tears began pouring down my face once again as whispered sob passing my lips "I never wanted all of this, I never wanted to risk my life each year and be praised like I am a super hero only to be locked away into an abusive home each summer,"

In that moment you could hear a pin drop, the shocked expressions frozen onto their faces as they noticed the older and impossible to have done by myself scars, "I just want to be left alone..."

With one last shuddering breath as the silhouettes began to ebb further into my vision, the blood pooling in my throat, "I want to die."

Sweet comfort began taking my soul into its abyss, ignoring the cries of the people around me. Slowly I began to see light, then three figures behind me, each putting a comforting hand on each of my shoulders. I looked up sorrowfully, the silhouettes of my parents hung above me, their faces staring comfortingly down at me, with Sirius reaching over and hugging me. Slowly the scene of people faded away, leaving My parents, Sirius and I behind. Leaving what was left of a broken empty shell.

* * *

**I do not own Harry Potter**


	2. Information Note: Important, please read

Hello guys, I apologize for my inactivity as of lately, I have lost interest in certain stories, and I feel when I go back to them, as if they aren't my best work. So as of now I am going to be rewriting everything! I have not updated for almost a year or more on most of my stories, and my writing has improved vastly, so do be patient. Some of them I will be renaming, some of them I am revamping completely, again, I apologize if I have kept many of you waiting, in the mean time, I will be giving updates so check this page for updates.

**Story Progess:**

_Water Plus Fire Equals Romance:_

Chapter One: Currently Working On

Chapter Two: Soon to be rewritten

Chapter Three: "

Chapter Four: "

Chapter Five: "

Chapter Six: "

Chapter Seven: "

Chapter Eight: "

_Of Cardinals and Lions:_

{This story will be renamed and turned into a multi-chaptered story hopefully. This is fourth or fifth on my to-do-list. The story will start out in their last year of high school and I will try to recapture their characterization properly this time, I have this problem with doing such things when it comes to my stories.}

Chapter One: Yet to be written

_Reality or Dementia:_

{This is actually one of the stories I am partially satisfied with, and will be continued as soon as I figure out a plot diagram.}

Chapter One: Done and Posted

Chapter Two: Done and Posted

Chapter Three: Currently in Progress

_Broken Inside:_

{I do plan on extending and expanding a bit more on this one, though it will still be a one shot.}

_Morning Light:_

{There is the possibility I will redo the entire story structure and alter what little plot there is there, maybe expand a bit on the lime, turn it into a lemon possibly.}

_Little Cloud of Joy:_

{*sigh* I am truly sorry guys, I just can't keep writing this, I just can't, so if anyone wants to adopt it and remake it, feel free, I am truly sorry.}


End file.
